101 Ways to Annoy Voldemort
by Hermione's-Purple-Quill78
Summary: Bella is fed up with Voldemort's slack, and decides to make a list of things she needs to do.


A:N: So I wrote this a long time ago. I decided to re post it so more people could see it. Originally I had ten chapters with 10 things to annoy Voldemort each, but I'll put them altogether this time. Thanks. :]

1. Reenact The Teletubbies

2. Follow him around with a taser

3. Sigh him up to be a Mary Kay consultant

4. Paint his house pink

5. Give him a "Murder for Dummies" book for his B-Day

6. Send him hate-mail, and say it's from Snape

7. Sequin his cloaks

8. Rock out to Hannah Montana in his house

9. Cuddle a Hamster in his presence

10. Follow him around and make duck noises

11.Tell him there's a good therapist in London

his stuff on E bay

him jealous of Lucious's hair

a video of him have a nervous breakdown do to your annoyance, and put it on YouTube

the last chocolate muffin

watch re-runs of Hello Kitty

him to go on a date with you, but never show up

remind him that he's a failure, and his life is worthless

a fanfiction about him

him he greatly resembles a walrus

Start Singing Hold On by the Jonas Brothers during an evil moment

22. Nick-name him Voldie.

23. Insist that he reads the hobbit.

24. Pin him to the floor while enjoying a meat ball sub

25. Set his house on fire.

26. Remind him he needs a nose job every day.

27. Ask him why he doesn't think Harry Potter is an adorable boy.

28. While he's dueling Harry Potter, stand in the background with a bag of popcorn and cheer him on.

29. Attack him with a novelty light saber

30. Name your pigmy-puff after him, and hug it constantly.

a luau in his front yard.

his house.

me to his birthday party.

him a shopping card, without any money on it.

his face with marshmallows.

him a cheesy valentine, in July.

with Hot Wheels on the counter, while making car noises.

him there is something wrong with the lights then, electrocute him.

a dog to pee on his shoes.

him, then smack him in the wall.

him he needs a haircut.

an ice cream truck into his house.

him he looked better as Tom Riddle.

his favourite DVD in the toaster.

how brilliant he is through the vents.

the film "Voldemort's Birth" and pull the tape out.

cardboard up his nose.

"To infinity and beyond!" every time toast pops out of the toaster.

cave-man noises, and whack him in the noggin with a club.

his head in a jar.

his cereal with dog food.

him around and spray everything he touches with disinfectant.

rolling stones songs in his ear every morning.

every time you watch Cinderella.

him he needs to cut his toenails.

a Dora the Explorer B-day party.

all his potion bottles with whipped cream.

wave to him.

, and laugh at his couch

pie in his face.

time he walks by dramaticly yell "I'm to young to die!"

his carpet carefully before letting him walk on it.

his ceiling .

the words "I love my mom" on his robes.

a heart with your hands and look at him through it.

that your deeply in love with him.

him he would do well in the food industry.

him while he's preforming the crutiatus curse, and blame it on a death eater. (Not mine one of my fellow reviewer's ideas)

a sign on his back saying "Kick me I'm Irish" (Not mine one of my fellow reviewer's ideas)

him a friendship bracelet, and insist he wears it.

cold water on him in the morning

him Harry is extremely sweet

Blast-Ended-Skrewts down his pants.

outloud … "Would Voldie look good in dress?

a running hose through the window of his house.

him to time out every time he hurts, or scares somebody.

at him for not fixing the mirrior he broke with his face.

away every time you see him.

him he's so hot, that you could bake cookies on him.

a song about him then sing it outside his house in the middle of the night

your self in thread.

meatballs at him.

, that the earth is square.

him a portrait of you.

his computer out the window.

a pillow fight.

his guitar, signed by the whomping willows, to the floor.

a bow on his head then run away.

him in a kitty pool.

him a moist towelette

92.Give acupuncture to one of his favourite teddy bears.

flower in his yard.

a tattoo of his face.

you stuffed Eeyore .

a bomb in his toilet.

at him.

blankly at his finger.

him a sweater, with a large V on it

at his feet.

a Voldemort fan-club, sell tee-shirts, bobble heads, and bumper stickers.


End file.
